Things I want Ella to know about her Mommy....

I have been SICK (all last weekend and some this week). I mean in the bed sick...asleep for 48 hours...only venturing out to visit the potty and fridge. So, I was extremely thankful that Bryan was off to help with Ella Claire and help take care of me.

Before I got to the "sleep it off" stage, I was tossing and turning and had a lot of time to think because I didn't feel like doing anything else. Bryan and I also watched The Family Man (one of our favs) which got me to thinking.

What things would I want Ella Claire to know about me, if something were to happen to me? I know this is a sad thing to sit and ponder on, but I'm a planner. So it's important to me to make preparations and talk about these things with Bryan. Before we went to sleep last night I asked Bryan to tell me some of the things that he would tell Ella Claire about me......should something happen. Before I knew it tears were pouring down. It was just so overwhelming. We talked forever about things that we would want the other one to share with Ella Claire. Oh, how I pray that we never have to go through something like that. 

I'm thinking about starting a journal to her though. I just feel this tugging at my heart. A have a few clients who lost their mother in an accident when they were small. I have a best friend who lost her mother to cancer. My father-in-law lost his mother when he was only 14 to cancer. It's important to me that Ella Claire know me, know my likes and dislikes, my quirks, my faults. So, I'm also going to start writing other things on this blog. This started out with the intent of being mainly about her as a way to document her first year and let relatives keep up with her. I've seen blogs made into little keepsake books and that has been my intent since I started. I've just tried to stay away from certain topics. However, I may blog about different things in the future. 

If you read my blog often please remember: 1. This is something I am starting to help my daughter have a better glimpse of who I am. I have decided to share some things with my readers (who may all be my immediate family), but my audience is truly one.  2. You don't have to agree with me. I hope I do not offend anyone. However, I have friends who I completely disagree with on many issues, but I continue to have great respect for them. They challenge me. 3. I may write more about things that are on my mind. I have always loved writing. It's my therapy! 

I realized through all of this how lucky I am to "know" my mother. I know....... she is a night-owl. She is a wonderful cook. I know she can't ride five minute in the car without falling asleep. I know she enjoys coaching cheerleading. I know she's loyal. I know she loves Gone With the Windand Patricia Cornwell. She is addicted to eBay and shopping for her girls, Bree and Ella. She's the only woman my Daddy has ever loved. She loves peanut m&m's and every once in awhile a payday. (do you remember those?) She drives too fast and therefore stops too fast. :) She tries to be good to everyone, but has learned over the years to take up for herself. She wants to do the right thing. She's human. She's not perfect. In fact, she hurts my feelings sometimes, but I'm just glad she's here to hurt my feelings. I can't imagine who I would be today or what my life would have been like without her. I love you, Mom. 

Bryan and I are watching Fireproof this week. I can't wait!

I'll leave you with a picture of my little dear........